So I finally did the Pre-Birkie
If you’re into outdoor sporting activities you’ve probably spent your fair share of time in porta-potties. Every running race, bike race and, yes, ski race has the ever present lines of people waiting for their turn. I feel like the easiest sport for the porta-potty stop is running as it is just shorts, sports bra, and running top. Biking is a little more complicated as you have to stow the bike somewhere and it gets more complicated if you are wearing bib shorts or a skinsuit. Ski racing though presents more challenges especially the colder it gets.
The start of the Pre-Birkie was around minus 3 degrees F. This means you have lots of layers to manage. It’s not like you want to go into a freezing cold porta-potty so you definitely go before you leave your lodging. It’s never enough though even if you aren’t all that nervous. Being just a little bit nervous combined with some morning caffeine means that you are destined to visit the blue plastic throne.
First you have to find a good location for your skis and poles where they won’t be in the way, won’t get knocked over in the wind and where you will be able to find them later. Nothing like looking desperately for your black Salomon skis propped up in a row of similar looking skis and all you can remember is that you left them in a snow bank to the left of the park shelter.
Once you have your skis and poles settled you hope the line isn’t too long as you are closing in on start time and you still have to deal with your drop bag (for your extra clothes) and negotiate the almost always icey path to the start line.
Once inside the porta-potty you have to decide what to do with your gloves, deal with the fact that you’re wearing somewhat bulky overpants, along with lycra tights, long underwear, boxer briefs, and on this particular day, also wicking underwear. That’s a lot of layers. Of course, it’s getting them back on that is the real challenge.
Given the sub zero temps I decided to go with the all in one motion. This is where you attempt to get all your layers back up in one good tug. This sounds great but can be fraught with issues. On this particular occasion I immediately knew there was something amiss; something was just not quite right. No quick wiggle or tug would solve the problem.
Unfortunately the root of the problem was that the quick tug only worked for 4 of the 5 layers. Yes, the underwear were still in their original dropped position while everything else was back up.
At this point you are more or less back to square one and you just have to admit defeat and go back to the method of pulling up only one or two layers at a time. Once you get the underwear and boxers situated back into their spot you can move on to the long underwear and lycra tights. Get those adjusted and get your overpants situated and zipped/snapped so they don’t fall down as soon as you leave your plastic castle.
Of course your efforts are not done yet but at this point you can elect to leave the porta-potty if you would prefer to fidget around outside instead. Yes, your pants are all up but you still have to get yourself retucked so as to avoid unnecessary drafts once you start skiing.
Luckily I only had to tuck in my one long underwear layer as I had opted to go for Craft long underwear top under my Bjorn Dhalie Olympic jacket (which is an awesome jacket combining warmth and moisture transfer such that it actually works for racing).
Sometimes I think it is amazing that anyone gets to the race start line on time given the clothing gymnastics required in the porta-potty. However somehow ski racers make it to the start line on time or at least close to on time (I’ve never been in the porta-potty when the race gun went off but it certainly has happened to friends). It’s easier if you’re not worried about your start position as you don’t need to worry about the announcer’s constant countdown until start time.
Once out of the porta-potty it was on to the next challenge – the drop bag truck. It’s always a fine line between too early and too late on the dropping off of the drop bag. When it’s below zero with a nice wind you want to keep your extra outer layers as long as possible. However, you also don’t want to be running to the start line and still trying to get your skis and poles on as the start gun is fired.
Eventually you just have to face the reality that you are going to be cold for a little while. Then it’s time to determine how best to get your over pants off over your tights without slipping on any ice while wearing ski boots that have slippery plastic bottoms. Finally you are forced to also relinquish your coat and realize your only hope is to ignore the cold. Then make sure you have your skis and your poles (sounds simple but trust me that this can be an area that gets you into trouble). Next up is getting into starting position which may or may not require some jockeying around.
Jockeying yourself into position can take many forms – elbowing your way to the front row because you’re a master blaster who thinks they belong with the elites or the exact opposite which is creeping backwards anytime someone lines up behind you. You can play it either way.
In a weird twist at the Pre-Birkie I actually could have lined up on the front row without throwing any elbows. The Classic race was a new addition to this event and it was a fairly small group. Still even at a small race it usually isn’t that easy to be on the front line especially if you don’t show up early. For some reason though at this race almost every classic racer felt that they had to be lined up in the groomed tracks and not in the wide open skate lane. I cannot explain this since we were starting on a lake and we were going to have to double pole a kilometer or two at least. It was just the oddest phenomenon to see all these people lined up ski to ski in the tracks while a small percentage of us lined up wherever we felt like it in the skate lane.
And then the race was off and we were double-poling across the lake.
The race was a race. The only thing that differentiated it from many a ski race is this: a ways in to the race a guy catches up to me on a hill. As he's passing me He turns to me and says that he's been behind me for about 2 hours and that I provided a better view than anything else out there.
About one minute later he gets out of the tracks and let's me repass him.
The start of the Pre-Birkie was around minus 3 degrees F. This means you have lots of layers to manage. It’s not like you want to go into a freezing cold porta-potty so you definitely go before you leave your lodging. It’s never enough though even if you aren’t all that nervous. Being just a little bit nervous combined with some morning caffeine means that you are destined to visit the blue plastic throne.
First you have to find a good location for your skis and poles where they won’t be in the way, won’t get knocked over in the wind and where you will be able to find them later. Nothing like looking desperately for your black Salomon skis propped up in a row of similar looking skis and all you can remember is that you left them in a snow bank to the left of the park shelter.
Once you have your skis and poles settled you hope the line isn’t too long as you are closing in on start time and you still have to deal with your drop bag (for your extra clothes) and negotiate the almost always icey path to the start line.
Once inside the porta-potty you have to decide what to do with your gloves, deal with the fact that you’re wearing somewhat bulky overpants, along with lycra tights, long underwear, boxer briefs, and on this particular day, also wicking underwear. That’s a lot of layers. Of course, it’s getting them back on that is the real challenge.
Given the sub zero temps I decided to go with the all in one motion. This is where you attempt to get all your layers back up in one good tug. This sounds great but can be fraught with issues. On this particular occasion I immediately knew there was something amiss; something was just not quite right. No quick wiggle or tug would solve the problem.
Unfortunately the root of the problem was that the quick tug only worked for 4 of the 5 layers. Yes, the underwear were still in their original dropped position while everything else was back up.
At this point you are more or less back to square one and you just have to admit defeat and go back to the method of pulling up only one or two layers at a time. Once you get the underwear and boxers situated back into their spot you can move on to the long underwear and lycra tights. Get those adjusted and get your overpants situated and zipped/snapped so they don’t fall down as soon as you leave your plastic castle.
Of course your efforts are not done yet but at this point you can elect to leave the porta-potty if you would prefer to fidget around outside instead. Yes, your pants are all up but you still have to get yourself retucked so as to avoid unnecessary drafts once you start skiing.
Luckily I only had to tuck in my one long underwear layer as I had opted to go for Craft long underwear top under my Bjorn Dhalie Olympic jacket (which is an awesome jacket combining warmth and moisture transfer such that it actually works for racing).
Sometimes I think it is amazing that anyone gets to the race start line on time given the clothing gymnastics required in the porta-potty. However somehow ski racers make it to the start line on time or at least close to on time (I’ve never been in the porta-potty when the race gun went off but it certainly has happened to friends). It’s easier if you’re not worried about your start position as you don’t need to worry about the announcer’s constant countdown until start time.
Once out of the porta-potty it was on to the next challenge – the drop bag truck. It’s always a fine line between too early and too late on the dropping off of the drop bag. When it’s below zero with a nice wind you want to keep your extra outer layers as long as possible. However, you also don’t want to be running to the start line and still trying to get your skis and poles on as the start gun is fired.
Eventually you just have to face the reality that you are going to be cold for a little while. Then it’s time to determine how best to get your over pants off over your tights without slipping on any ice while wearing ski boots that have slippery plastic bottoms. Finally you are forced to also relinquish your coat and realize your only hope is to ignore the cold. Then make sure you have your skis and your poles (sounds simple but trust me that this can be an area that gets you into trouble). Next up is getting into starting position which may or may not require some jockeying around.
Jockeying yourself into position can take many forms – elbowing your way to the front row because you’re a master blaster who thinks they belong with the elites or the exact opposite which is creeping backwards anytime someone lines up behind you. You can play it either way.
In a weird twist at the Pre-Birkie I actually could have lined up on the front row without throwing any elbows. The Classic race was a new addition to this event and it was a fairly small group. Still even at a small race it usually isn’t that easy to be on the front line especially if you don’t show up early. For some reason though at this race almost every classic racer felt that they had to be lined up in the groomed tracks and not in the wide open skate lane. I cannot explain this since we were starting on a lake and we were going to have to double pole a kilometer or two at least. It was just the oddest phenomenon to see all these people lined up ski to ski in the tracks while a small percentage of us lined up wherever we felt like it in the skate lane.
And then the race was off and we were double-poling across the lake.
The race was a race. The only thing that differentiated it from many a ski race is this: a ways in to the race a guy catches up to me on a hill. As he's passing me He turns to me and says that he's been behind me for about 2 hours and that I provided a better view than anything else out there.
About one minute later he gets out of the tracks and let's me repass him.
posted by MadCross at 3:43 PM
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